I think this week the name of the game is "feeling like it". I have to figure out a way to feel like it. Feel like going to school, feel like making dinner, feel like rotating laundry. Feel like doing anything but staring out the window.
Do you know those times that come around when you just have to soak in the last few months - years,.... the last decade or so? I think I'm soaking. And I wonder what I'll think of all of it in the end. I hope I'll think it's beautiful.
She walks in beauty.....
That's as far as I want to go. Somehow everything is more beautiful when the light is dim and there is melancholy music in the background. Jim Carrey said "the only thing wrong with real life is there's no danger music". I would probably choose the soundtrack to some gorgeous romantic movie. And then would my life be more beautiful? Dim the lights and turn up the music? Is that it? Will that make me feel like it? If I looked at all the snapshots on a slow dissolve in my mind? Yes...... I'm certain.
There are a lot of kisses on the head. A lot of laughing. Sometimes Jessie and I can't stop. Douglas talks to me. A lot. David is so happy to see me at 4:00 and Corinne can't get enough squeezes in a day. I can't believe I'm in charge of this group. Oh.
And Rich. He and I are just getting started. Somehow that is magically so.
So what is beauty? A slow glance around the room to assure myself that all is well. Children are safe, husband is home and we are - together. In every sense of the word.
I walk in beauty.....
ps - if you read this while listening to something from the Amelie soundtrack - you may just want to be me.
No comments:
Post a Comment